Divorce Doesn’t Have to Mean the End of Friendships

It is very common for some women to withdraw from their friends and be less social after going through a divorce. Now is not the time to be by yourself, especially during the holiday season! Being alone may only invite excessive dwelling on the past and the  regrets you may have. 

 

It may, however, be a good time to re-evaluate your friendships and set new boundaries for the friends you associate with and allow into your life. Choose to surround yourself with people who love you, support you, encourage you, and help you feel your best. Unfortunately, you may find that some of the friendships you had when you were married are actually emotionally draining and bring you down with their excessive complaining or negative attitudes. It may be beneficial to spend less time with mutual friends from your marriage who cannot seem to stop talking about your divorce whenever you are together. 

 

Instead of allowing yourself to be affected by other people’s negative energy, find people who have a positive spirit and fill your life with them! In order to attract these people into our lives and have healthy relationships, self-respect and self-love are key. Spending time with positive people will attract more joy and happiness into your life and allow you to focus on the things that matter most to you. You will be uplifted by their energy, optimistic outlook, and love of life and experience more of the same in your own life. 

 

In your life after divorce, it is also important to develop new friendships that are separate from your previous life. it is important to rediscover things you love to do that may have been forgotten over the years.  Did you have hobbies or activities that you stopped doing at some point during your marriage?  Most couples take on new activities together, and have far less time to do the things that they once did as individuals. Take time for yourself to rediscover your hobbies and passions, and pursue them once again. Give yourself permission to try new interests or activities you have  always wanted to, but for one reason or another, could not make the time.

 

In addition to adding some new routines to your life, you will also benefit from new relationships with people who share your interests. Join a local organization or social group that participates in activities that interest you. If you enjoy crafts, for example, check your local crafting store’s schedule of classes or social meetings where people get together and craft side by side. If you play an instrument, consider joining a church or group that performs locally. The opportunities are endless – book clubs, gardening groups, parenting organizations, volunteer groups. Whatever your interests are, you can find a group of like-minded people to associate with and create new friendships that may last a lifetime. You may even find a gift!